Ten Year Anniversary of Nomadic Life--and a Book Birthday!

This month marks 10 years of the traveling life for Dave and me. Ten years since I signed my retirement papers at San Jose State University and we left Santa Cruz to live without a house for a year, just to see what would happen. 

We had no idea we were joining a movement of people who were embracing versions of the itinerant life. From retired full-time travelers to digital nomads to those deemed "location independent" to world-schoolers who take their kids along. 

Housesit = Petsit

We also hadn't yet discovered housesitting (click here). Or the little casita we'd end up buying in Baja. We hadn't known I'd have two major health crises that both would require surgery--and that instead of scaring us into stasis they'd fire us up to keep traveling. 

We hadn't known we'd befriend people all over the world. Or that we'd encounter wild animals on land and sea. We didn't know that we'd travel more as wanderers than strict planners, taking advantage of opportunities that floated our way.

I'd hoped but hadn't known for sure that my literary life would expand--that I'd teach writing workshops in Thailand and California, that I'd publish articles and four books, that we'd move to China where I'd teach Creative Writing at Guangxi University.

I'd suspected I'd write about this but didn't know in what way. First came Call It Wonder: An Odyssey of Love, Sex, Spirit, and Travel and then  Wanderland: Living the Traveling Life. Its birthday is TODAY! 

Wanderland is about housesitting and nomadic life and reflections on home, and it comes out at an interesting time--just as I've been thinking of Baja less as "home base" and more as "home."

We recently became Mexican residents, complete with driver's licenses and Baja plates on Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, our blue Subaru that has carried us along thousands of miles whenever we weren't in a plane, bus, boat, taxi, Uber, or tuk-tuk.

This doesn't mean we won't continue to housesit, explore, wander. I still love the feel of flying, of being unrooted. At the same time, we're intertwined with our community here, and I adore this area and our casita. I'm glad it's small because, as I write about in both books, living light has always appealed to me. 

Ten years has taught me a lot--especially that the world is mostly an inviting place, and that I'm more flexible and adaptable than I ever believed. 

When we left California ten years ago, I couldn't have imagined this life. Back then I had more of a feeling than a vision. A feeling of leaning into expansiveness. And while this life isn't perfect, it fits us well. 

You can order Wanderland: Living the Traveling Life from Amazon, Barnes & Noble, my publisher, or through any bookstore. See my other books at my website. 

Seven Hops from Louisiana to Colorado

We had two weeks to make it from New Orleans to our month-long housesit in Colorado. Dave researched mini adventures on the route, segmenting the drive so we'd not have more than five or six hours in the car at a time. As we talked it through, I looked into lodging. Hours later, we had a plan. Here's what we did:

1. I was aching to see the ocean, so we headed east and spent three nights in Gulfport, Mississippi. The road along the coast runs for miles. I felt myself exhale at the sight of white sand and blue water stretching to infinity. 

Gulfport, as seen from our boat tour

After we dropped off our stuff at the Airbnb, a kind-of-cute converted shed billed as a cottage, we referred to Dave's notes and plugged Good Karma Cafe into the GPS. The route took us to a parking lot filled with vans. We called the restaurant. They said we were close and redirected us. That took us to a church. 

By this time, we were exhausted and hungry. That morning we'd done all the obligatory hard work at the end of a housesit: packing (sounds easy but when you've been in a place for three weeks, not so much), cleaning the house, washing the towels and sheets and making the bed, and driving three hours. But we are nothing if not stubborn in our quest for vegan food, so we called again...and voila! Finally. 

And boy was it worth it. The place is darling, and the Indian/Malaysian fusion food is flavorful...so good, in fact, we went two nights in a row. We chatted with the young cook (his mom owns the place) and his girlfriend who is the server. He likes to write, and she wants to travel. Of course I encouraged him to tell his stories, and we told her about housesitting. 

Fishbone Alley murals

The next two days we explored Gulfport. The small downtown is sprinkled with colorful murals. On a stroll, we happened to come across a breast cancer walk, with people (and dogs) adorned in pink. 

We took two hikes, one on the gentle Coffee Creek trail, and another in the Sandhill Crane Wildlife Refuge. After so much city living, it was wonderful to walk in nature, even though we didn't see any of those elusive birds.

An egret (not a sandhill crane) one of Dave's gets on Coffee Creek Trail

Another day we took a dolphin boat tour and learned from the marine biologist on board that the area is one of the most eco-diverse in the world. 

Dolphins!

2. Next we drove to Birmingham, Alabama. Our Airbnb apartment was tucked in a neighborhood that reminded us of the Berkeley hills.

16th Street Baptist Church

We had only one day to spend in Birmingham, and we made it all about the history. The Civil Rights Institute is an immersive experience that makes you feel like you're walking through time, experiencing the human suffering, the resistance, the redemption. 

Birds carrying her away...

The museum sits catty-corner from the 16th Street Baptist Church, which the Klan bombed in 1963, killing four girls, ages 11-14. A heart-rending sculpture called "Four Spirits" honors the girls at nearby West Park. As we walked through the park, we took in other sculptures and monuments in this place deep with history that resonates to this day.

3. Next we drove to Knoxville, Tennessee for one specific reason: to see our niece, Hailey, who is a nursing student at UT.

100-year-old Ayers Hall

We arrived at yet another Airbnb apartment, on the fourth floor of a building near campus. It was compact but had everything we needed. (Except, like some places we've stayed, the couch was like sitting in a hard taco. When we get back to Mexico I want to buy the most comfy couch I can find!) 

What a joy to spend the day with Hailey. We checked out her townhouse and met one of her roommates. Then we went out to lunch and she took us on a tour of the charming town and gorgeous campus. 

Dave, Hailey & Dolly

I couldn't be more proud of Hailey. She's a great student in a challenging major, works at the hospital, does kickboxing, engages with her sorority's activities including volunteering--and she knows what she wants in life! I wish I'd had my head on so straight at that age. 

hat capers

4. Next up was Chattanooga, Tennessee where we had a weekend housesit, caring for super sweet Sasha. 

good girl

The apartment was in an elegant vintage building in a historic neighborhood of grand old homes. Walking the streets, we encountered historical plaques describing battles that took place there. I found that a bit strange, rather long narratives recounting the details of x platoon and y general and z reconnaissance. I'm much more interested in historical people's stories than the technical details of the war machine. 

comfy bed...but the couch wasn't

Another battle site is Lookout Mountain. I skimmed over the information of yet more warring and enjoyed the place as a walk in nature.

Lookout Mountain

We also spent time walking around downtown Chattanooga. It's a lovely city, with its stunning art museum building, its sculpture garden, and the impressive Walnut Street bridge, built in 1891, that spans the Tennessee River. The bridge used to allow horses and buggies, but now it's pedestrians only.

Our last morning there, I woke up with itchy eyes swollen so badly I could hardly see. I'd inadvertently used apparently toxic shampoo as "soap" to wash my face. We usually share the driving, but Dave would have to take the wheel for our drive to...

5. Paducah, Kentucky. The Airbnb prices in this area were so high that we chose a hotel room instead. I've resisted hotels because I want a homier feel...but the American Inn turned out great. It had two comfy queen beds (we like to have a second bed to put our luggage on) and the usual amenities that were plenty for one night. 

We were taken with with the town's well-maintained historical buildings, clean streets, cute shops, museums, and murals along the ten-mile long floodwall where the Ohio and Tennessee rivers meet. 

The paintings display Paducah's historical days.

One of the images reveals a hidden horror in the town: a Uranium Enrichment Facility that operated from 1952 to 2013 that apparently poisoned many of its workers and contaminated the environment, a problem to this day. (See this article and this film.)  What a terrible injustice for the residents and the health of this area.

6. In the morning, my eyes were still itchy but much less swollen, so I was able to give Dave a break from driving duties. We crossed a large swath of Illinois into Warrensburg, Missouri where we planned to meet up with Darlena Ciraulo, a Shakespeare scholar and professor at University of Central Missouri. We were early so first we walked around the sweet, small campus.

Colorful fall day on campus

It was great to see Dar (who is the daughter of my co-author Janelle; we wrote this book together). And the timing was perfect, because she had a one-hour break in her teaching schedule. We learned that as a Covid precaution, large classes are split up into several smaller meetings...which has more than doubled the time she teaches, giving the same lecture over and over. But she had a smile on her face as we chatted about academia and life. The university is lucky to have her.

With Dar

A few more hours of driving, and we stopped for lunch in St. Louis at Seedz in the leafy Forest Park neighborhood. I had the best vegan Cesar salad ever. 

Dave captured the St. Louis skyline out the car window.

Outside Seedz

A few hours more, and we made it to our Boonville, Missouri Airbnb. The place didn't live up to its cute listing. It was a basement apartment that felt very...basementy. (Cold, dark, damp.) The space heater didn't do enough to combat the chill, and fuses blew a few times. Fortunately, the owner was there and tripped the switch, but for $74 we could have gotten a good hotel room. (Check out this article about why Airbnb prices are going up.)

7.  Another five-hour driving day lay ahead to get to Hays, Kansas. Many people had mentioned that driving through Kansas was boring, but I didn't mind the green-and-gold landscape. And we broke up the trip with a stop in Kansas City for lunch at Cafe Gratitude. 

Food was good but a bit too pricey.

This happened to be a Wednesday, the day I Zoom with three of my girlfriends (and former colleagues) every-other-week. You can see my friend Cathy from the UK on my phone, but I swear I went outside for the conversation!

We had another good hotel experience at the Days Inn in Hays. Great price, comfy bed to lay down our road-weary heads. Oh, and a TV to watch The Voice.

What a joy to wake up the next morning realizing we had only one more five-hour segment to get to our next destination: Denver. We've now been in Colorado a couple of weeks, and I'll tell you all about it in my next installment. 

Car tripping isn't for everyone--and as I said in a previous post, we're in the middle of a road adventure that started in California and, in the spring, will end in Baja Sur, Mexico. It's likely our last big long-distance drive. Yet writing has made me appreciate how much of this vast and complex and beautiful country we've seen.

Housesitting All Over the World

"How long are you on vacation?" That's a question we get a lot--most recently on a snorkel boat in Molokai. When we answer that we aren't on vacation, people get curious about our nomadic lives--especially when they are on the islands for a week and we've been there for six months, five of them housesitting. 

The minute we mention housesitting, we are barraged with questions. I reached out to my Facebook friends who posed questions as well. Here are my answers:

Housesitting in Malaysia

How do you get into housesitting with no experience? What are the actual steps you need to take to begin doing this type of housesitting--actual, emotional, financial?

I have written about these issues in my book and this article and a lot in this blog. When we looked at our lives and asked ourselves what we really wanted, our answer was freedom. 

That meant living off of our retirement income and savings for a while, doing what we wanted to do, before it was too late. We wanted to travel, rather than being in debt and tied to one area. My mindset was that the void is fertile. 

In other words: letting go of things we held onto meant discovering new possibilities that we couldn't have otherwise seen. One of our discoveries was housesitting.

Rancho Palos Verdes housesit

There are several housesitting websites, but our favorite is Trusted Housesitters. Dozens of new sits come up every day all over the world. Many are a month or longer, although they range from just a few days to a year or more. No money exchanges hands. We care for others' homes and pets, and we have a free place to stay. It's an act of service because people can travel without worry.

We started by developing our page on the site, including references from friends, and paying a bit more for the optional background check. As we do sits, homeowners write reviews. You can get reviews more quickly if you apply for short housesits near where you live--for instance, a weekend in San Francisco if you live in the Bay Area, before you branch out.

Because we are now known as housesitters, people often come to us; as a result, we have done gigs for friends and acquaintances as well.

Describe the weirdest or wackiest task you've been asked to do.

Get up at 6 a.m. to feed the 40 ducks, chickens, geese, turkeys and rabbits. 

Farmer Dave

What kind of budget do you need to have if you do that full time?

This varies greatly depending on the person. We don't housesit full-time because several months a year we stay at our place in Mexico. We live on a small amount of money per month compared to many Americans, approximately $1,500-3000, based on how much travel we are doing. In addition to discovering housesitting, I've learned that a digital nomad is a thing. Some of our income now comes through the writing, editing and coaching I can do wherever we are. We also rent out our little place in Mexico on Airbnb. And as we travel, other opportunities arise, such as the year I spent teaching in China, and the writing workshop I developed with a guy I met in Thailand.

What also helps support our lifestyle (in addition to no rent or mortgage, and no utilities while housesitting) is that we don't buy a bunch of stuff--because our small house in Mexico has little storage, and the rest of the time we're living out of a suitcase. 

It's a mindset--not that we're doing without, but that we're rich in what we love in life: travel experiences, nature, meeting people, time with friends and family, writing, reading, music, and enjoying animals.

Hiking with Freckles on our housesit in Long Beach, Washington

How do you avoid surprises in this process? What are the dos and don'ts for both parties related to screening for the engagement? Have you ever said "no" after a Skype?

There are always surprises--and we have learned to become more and more adaptive and flexible. However, creating a list of questions can help. I think of our Skype with homeowners as an interview that goes both directions. If I haven't seen many pictures of the house online, I might ask for a video tour. I like to know what size bed we will be sleeping in--and if we have full access to the house. Some homeowners want you to sleep in the guest room, which is fine as long as the bed is a queen or bigger, especially for a housesit longer than a few days.

We like to ask a lot of questions about the pets: Has the dog ever shown aggression? Are any of the animals incontinent? Not that we can't handle these things, but we want to make an informed choice. We also ask about the animals' routines, the neighborhood, and use of a car, which is important for longer housesits when car rental would be prohibitive...although sometimes we have our own car with us, if we've driven it up from Mexico. In our current housesit in San Diego, we are even using the homeowner's RV! She encouraged it because her little dogs love camping. Reviews are posted on hosts' pages, so you can see what other housesitters thought of the experience.

Lulu and Sammie (siblings) enjoyed RV camping with us.

And yes, we did say no to a sit once after a Skype--because the cat was so old and feeble that the homeowner thought it might die on our watch, which we could (sadly) handle but she seemed nervous about the whole thing...and she wanted us to sleep in a double bed, even though the master bedroom had a king. Most homeowners, though, are very generous and kind. We have made good friends this way.

Longest gig? And most peaceful?

Our longest gig was four months on the Big Island of Hawaii. That was probably our most peaceful, too...in a remote, rural area with a sweeping view of the ocean. We cared for one dog and enjoyed our daily long walks with her.

And a bonus in Hawaii: huge fruits and veggies picked in the yard.

Our nearly three months in Forest Ranch in Northern California was very peaceful as well. The dog could be walked off-leash on the trails right out the door.

Forest Ranch property

Are there options out there for those allergic to cats and dogs?

Occasionally you will see a gig that doesn't include animal care, but those are rare. Some, though, include non-furry animals, like fish or birds. And some involve feeding animals that live outside only. For instance, our sit on Maui required feeding three outdoor cats.

Maui

What have been the best and worst of your experiences?

Each place has had its good aspects and drawbacks. For instance, my favorite dog we cared for was a sweetie in Australia named Gem. She and I just clicked. However, overall we weren't too fond of the area and its very windy weather. So we focused on what we liked: the dog, nearby hot springs and movie houses, and the lake we walked around every day that had more than 100 species of birds.

Another example is our housesit in Malaysia. You can't argue with this view:

But we were disappointed when we learned the beaches in Penang aren't swimmable. We'd envisioned a tropical paradise experience. Usually we research a place beforehand (highly recommended!) but in this case, we hadn't. We did love the adorable dog, though, and the amazing Olympic-sized swimming pool. And in our month there, we met some great people. 

Basically, we have learned to relax into wherever we are, rather than focusing on expectations being dashed. And living in other places is helping me get clearer and clearer about what I like about home and place.

What is the hardest part of housesitting that people might not realize when they jump into it? 

For us, it's the transition time into a new gig. After the often tiring experience of traveling, we arrive in a home to spend hours, and sometimes a day or two, with the owners who orient us to the pets, home and area. It's a lot to take in. But it's also fun and exciting to get to meet new people and animals.

Max and Levi in Port Townsend, Washington

How do you get used to a new place? Seems like it would take a toll on your system.

We are getting better and better at this, becoming more adaptive with each experience. My biggest issue often is figuring out where the light switches are! And finding place for my stuff in the freezer. People's freezers are usually packed, although thoughtful homeowners make space for us in the fridge, drawers, and closets. Getting our personal effects organized helps a lot. But, yes, it does take a toll, which is why it's important to make sure we allow ourselves some rest the first few days--after we have shopped and oriented ourselves. Having a sweet dog or cat to cuddle with helps.

My writing spot at our houessit on the big island of Hawaii.

Have you ever broken anything? How did that go?

Nothing major. Once I broke one of my host's favorite mugs. I quickly went online and found similar cups and had them mailed to her. At a housesit in Washington, a chimney fire flared up. A neighbor, who happened to work for the fire department, noticed and came by. He told us how to handle it--but we were unnerved. It's hard to imagine something worse than burning down a host's house! When we told the homeowner, he said it had happened before, that the wood burning stove wasn't a good design. So now we can add to our list of questions: "Ever had a chimney fire?"

Dave and Ely at our Tahoe housesit.

What are some common forms of etiquette that both sitters and hosts do for each other? Like leave flowers upon arrival or departure? Is tipping a thing on either end? 

Even though we aren't paid, people have given us some cash at times as a "tip"--or to cover any unexpected expenses. They have also left us gifts, the most elaborate being at a Seattle housesit: a box of handmade chocolates, two bottles of local wine, and a gift certificate to their favorite restaurant. Often, they pick us up at the airport and take us out to eat.

On our end, if we spend some time with the hosts we cook a meal or two. If we are there when they come home, we will have dinner ready. While they are gone, we regularly update the hosts, sending them pictures of the animals and telling them what we've been up to. Even though many of the hosts have house cleaners who continue to come while we are there, we make sure the house is spic-n-span, often cleaner than when we arrived--including all towels and bedding washed. If there are flowers to pick in the garden, we might bring some in. And if we have finished books that we brought, we leave them behind.

How does it feel to be intimate with a stranger's stuff, place, bed, things?

It kind of reminds me of when I used to babysit...although I'm less nosey now than when I was a teen! My favorite thing is to walk into a house that has shelves crammed with books we can read during our time there. For a day or two, it might feel a little awkward to be in someone else's space, but soon we settle into our temporary home.

Our month on Maui, thanks to a housesit.

Do you get attached to the place, house, pets you care for? Is it hard to move on sometimes? Do you get the urge to nest?

We always nest wherever we are: cooking, doing yoga, reading, etc., in what is essentially our home for the time being. Often the homes are very nice and have all the comforts that make for great nesting, from nice furniture and beautiful kitchens to pools, gardens, views, and hot tubs. 

Saying goodbye is bittersweet. Living this life is an ongoing lesson in non-attachment. The pets are great teachers about living in the moment. When we are leaving, I think about how happy they will be to see their owners, and that helps. 

And then I focus on the part of me that's ready to relinquish responsibility--and that's excited about the next adventure. Basically...we've stumbled into a lifestyle that fits us well.

Saying goodbye to Gem.